On Attachment

#189: Why Anxiously Attached People Struggle with Jealousy

• Season 1 • Episode 189

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Jealousy is one of the most common—and most shamed—experiences for people with anxious attachment. In this episode, we’re exploring where jealousy really comes from, how it manifests in relationships, and why it makes so much sense through the lens of self-worth and attachment wounding.

I share personal reflections from my own journey with jealousy, alongside insights to help you understand your patterns with more compassion and clarity. Whether you obsessively compare yourself to others, feel threatened by your partner’s past, or find yourself spinning out when you don’t feel like a priority, this episode will help you start untangling the deeper fears driving those reactions.

We’ll cover:

  • Why jealousy is often a symptom of deeper insecurity and low self-worth
  • The difference between jealousy and envy — and why both show up for anxiously attached people
  • Common behaviours (like social media stalking or reassurance-seeking) and why they don’t actually soothe your fears
  • What to do when jealousy arises — and why shame only makes it worse
  • Why building self-worth is the most powerful antidote to chronic jealousy

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